|
|
|
Self-esteem -
the key to save humanity
Having a high self-esteem, means possessing the most important
spiritual means for attaining an improved self image as well for
the realization of our purpose.
High self-esteem is of primary
importance at any time, especially today, when humanity faces
fateful problems. In this chapter, we will create the key to
that shut gate of values, which once opened, will enable our
most dramatic leap to the future, equipped with a far higher
personal ability, assuring, to a great extent, our natural
survival and progress in coming
generations
The importance of self-esteem is in its being the value which
brings about natural development, without resistance, of most
spiritual values and capabilities in general and in particular,
of those spiritual values that actualize man’s purpose.
Already at this chapter's beginning, we sense that we stand at
the threshold of a highly impressive means of man’s internal
self. Due to its significance, we shall crown it as a
meta-value. What did man learn from his mistakes along the course of
generations
Whatever was learned can be summed up by an assertion that
appears in Herald Sherman’s book “Know your mind”. The author
notes that humanity has made innumerable sacrifices over many
years, in order to reach such a simple conclusion: that creating
heaven or hell on earth is in its own hands - yet he still has not
learned enough to apply this principle. In this chapter we will
prove that this miserable reality can be dramatically improved.
Those philosophers dealing with ethics attempted, throughout the
last centuries, to find a path, a principle, by which they could
persuade man (who is egotistical by nature) that it's in his
interest to act morally. Unfortunately, no categorical solution
to this question has been found as yet. Is it possible? Most
certainly so. This chapter will present and prove it.
Man’s awareness of self-esteem's importance
It can confidently be stated that most people are not aware
of the essence and importance of this significant spiritual
tool. It is therefore easy to understand why we have done so
little to elevate it. On the other hand, we did receive from our
Creator, many years ago, all that is necessary for doing so.
These divine contents can be seen to contain a perfect process
for elevating of man’s self-esteem. Somehow, so far, we have
been unsuccessful in discovering enough of their essence to
actualize this supremely important process.
What are these contents
These are three Divine expressions, arranged in order of
importance:
The first expression constitutes the reason for man to elevate
his self-esteem. It comes to raise the topic, to present its
importance and purpose, as well as to encourage man to elevate
and implement it (see the chapter dedicated to Yom Kippur – The
Day of Atonement). The second expression constitutes a primary
means for the actual raising of self-esteem. This means will be
detailed later. The third expression constitutes a continual
process for raising self-esteem and for transforming its
expression into a habit (this too will be detailed later).
If we examine these divine contents, we will realize that his
Grace bestowed us with a most impressive means of identifying,
raising and implementing the value which holds the key to our
long-term survival, development and proper function.
Contrasts between the divine and
the Jewish religion's effect on the quality of man's self esteem.
I would like to present one of
the sharpest contrasts concerning this attribute and the way for
its realization.
While God, by His Word, attempts to raise our self-esteem, along
comes religion, with prepared prayers, and tries lowering it. It
does so by constraining man to repeatedly ask God to forgive his
sins and to help him exist. I see this activity as an attempt to
lock man into low self-esteem and constant sinner with no
possibility of release.
Self-esteem and self-worth
These concepts derive from each other and can be interchanged.
Self-worth refers to man’s value, whereas his self-esteem is the
expression of this value towards the external world.
What is a person’s self-esteem
Self-esteem is a form of spiritual state, a spiritual
infrastructure, on which a person’s spiritual forces develop. It
is also an attribute, an urge and a unique creative energy,
which may be either negative or positive. Positive energy raises
self-esteem, thereby encouraging positive development. Negative
energy, in contrast, lowers self-esteem and in so doing,
inhibits or arrests this positive development and encourages a
negative one. It will be easier to better understand the meaning
of self-esteem if we view it from our own perspective and from
God’s.
From our perspective, it is the level of self-esteem we perceive
ourselves to have, by which we appreciate and present ourselves
to the outside world, and by which we also act and react. This
is also the level at which we appreciate the other. As this
level tends to shift, it should be seen as subjective.
From God’s perspective, this is a person’s true self-esteem and
its level is steady. This level follows from Gods declaration
that man was created in His image. It is this level which the
Divine attempts to persuade us to accept as proper and to act in
accordance with. Our divine purpose, as well as His expectations
for its realization and implementation, is also based on this
level. This level is always higher, sometimes far higher than
our subjective self-esteem. In other words: Our perceived
self-worth is significantly lower than the true one.
High self-esteem and low self-esteem
These are two faces of one coin, presenting contrasting
qualities that are revealed under different circumstances. The
high self-esteem's face is the positive one, and is therefore
the natural face. In this face, we develop and function
properly, bringing us to act as a “creation born in God’s own
image". In contrast, the other face is revealed due to our
inability to present the positive one, and we therefore work in
opposition to it, causing us, sometimes, to act like the most
terrible beasts of all.
Our level of self-esteem may change according to circumstances
and is especially determined by our reactions to them. It is
hard, maybe even impossible, to maintain high self-esteem when
society treats us as worthless. It could be said that the more
we maintain a high level of self-esteem, despite circumstances
which try to lower it, the more will our self-esteem have a
stable infrastructure and will be expressed in a better and more
proper manner.
High self-esteem
This is a unique spiritual state, in which we sense high
inherent worth. This is how we present ourselves to the world.
We radiate self-confidence, importance and closeness to the
other and feel free and at ease. In this state, we lose many of
our spiritual disturbances and imperfections. This brings us to
develop and function in a far more proper and efficient manner.
Our high self-esteem also brings us to see the other as
possessing a similar inherent worth, and thus leads us to
appreciate him, respect him, desire his company and assist him
in every way (see also the chapter “Know who you are” in this
site).
Reaching a stage at which we efficiently develop mentally and
spiritually, with no undue resistance and in a positive
direction, is no small feat. This is man’s greatest
accomplishment in his path towards the realization of his
purpose and of-course, the greatest improvement his self-image
achieves through a single, relatively simple spiritual process.
It may be said that in a person of high self-esteem, a
significant part of his divine content (which most of us believe
exists), is revealed.
A person’s high self-esteem and the spiritual status he acquires
significantly affects the type of feelings he experiences. A
person’s emotional system is not indifferent to his self-image's
dramatic improvement. These feelings are an integral part of
that characteristic displayed by this kind of person. They also
form an integral part of the full and happy life, which a person
of this status experiences. If the level of positive emotions
which a person experiences in his everyday life is a function of
his positive activity, it could be said that in acting from a
position of high self-esteem, a person experiences a very high
level of positive feelings.
The divine expression “return to me” to communal activity after
purification (raising self-worth) as specified in the chapter
“Yom Kippur” (“Day of Atonement”), comprises a confirmation by
the highest source to the impressive potential functioning and
degree of status gained by whoever attains a high self-esteem.
This dramatic improvement by a significant proportion of a
nation will also result in outstanding social improvement, with
all its implications. Humanity's acting from this status will
certainly bring about the fulfillment of Isaiah’s prophecy, by
which human wars and conflicts shall cease.
Is there a qualitative advantage to a high self-esteem which is
gained through God’s declaration about man’s being, to a
similarly high self-esteem gained in another manner? It seems to
me the former does have an advantage, in that in addition to the
expression of appreciation, there is an expression of holiness
towards the person with whom he comes into contact. This
advantage brings about the appearance of further positive
qualities and following that, to a more perfected elevation of
self-esteem.
We have a need to posses a high self-esteem. This expresses
itself by our wish to be important. Receiving certain spiritual
sustenance from the other satisfies this need. We are dealing
not only with words of unique content, but also with
constructive, positive energy, which includes affirmation and
recognition of our importance. With the sincere acceptance of
this nourishment, both these products come into expression.
Facts on the ground point to the personality of low self-esteem,
being mostly on the receiving side of this nourishment, while
that of high self-esteem is mostly on the giving side. This
explains why the low self-esteem personality seeks out the
closeness of the other.
A person with high self-esteem has an urge to supply this
sustenance to the other. This urge is so powerful with some that
they actively seek out ways of approaching the needy in order to
provide this food, and have no greater satisfaction than when
they succeed in this task. So nature closes another glorious and
very special circle for the mutual raising of self-esteem in
human society. These facts have brought about the appearance of
techniques for obtaining and providing such food. These are
called techniques for improved human relations.
Low self-esteem
Just as high self-esteem symbolizes unity, recognition,
appreciation and love between people; low self-esteem signifies
separation, non-recognition, hostility and hatred. A person with
low self-esteem tends to see others as he sees himself, namely,
worthless and due to that, treats him immorally. Two forms of
expression are possible in this condition: inward expression and
outward expression. The first form is usually directed at the
person himself whereas the second one is usually directed
towards the other. It is in this action that sometimes the worst
beast of all is revealed within him.
Personality's characteristics: He tends to create friction
and trouble. In extreme cases everything is perceived as a
threat, causing him to react in extreme ways, such as
non-cooperation, vengefulness, violence, hatred and even
killing. Such a person suffers from frustration, loneliness,
emptiness, dependency, light-headedness and over sensitivity.
He is childish, sometimes failing and blames society for his
failures and frustrations. He suffers from a sense of
inferiority and therefore avoids being active in it. Often, he
does not dare to take responsibility and act. Due to his meager
ability to obtain things honestly, there are those who obtain
their wishes immorally. He is ashamed of his personality and
tries to hide it; tries presenting himself as he would wish to
be.
In spite of the numerous obstacles facing such a person, he
can certainly raise his self-esteem, develop and efficiently
step towards infinite progress and enjoy the real life which
this status provides.
The “freeborn” personality type and the “enslaved” one
These too are contrasting types and they also constitute two
faces of the same coin.
The “freeborn” personality type: as his status suggests, is
spiritually mature and feels free to naturally express himself.
The “enslaved” personality type: is childish, feels heavily
dependent on the other and finds it difficult to naturally
express himself
While the “freeborn” type is brimming with high self-esteem, the
“enslaved” type is shrouded in low self-esteem. Whereas the
“freeborn” type turns to the other with love and appreciation,
the “enslaved” type turns to the other with scorn and brutality.
While the “freeborn” type mostly experiences positive feelings,
the contrasting type spends most of his time experiencing
negative feelings.
Symbolically, the “enslaved” personality can be equated to the
personality of the Israelites when they were slaves in Egypt,
approximately 3200 years ago. We do not need to undergo slavery
in order to act and feel like slaves. We find this personality
type in many of our societies and homes, in which the atmosphere
and education are particularly dictatorial.
One of the most efficient methods of uprooting the sensation of
enslavement from such a person’s heart is to cultivate his
awareness who he truly is.
Know who you are
The ideal approach for solving all our problems
Wouldn’t it be wonderful if by implementing a single meta-value,
we could dramatically improve our internal selves and our
abilities?
A value, whose implementation leads to the realization of all
our expectations and of God’s expectation of us, bringing about
a life full of joy, happiness, respect and a desire for such a
life; for spiritual and physical health and longevity. In so
doing, a path will open to a loving, assisting and encouraging
society; to fitting future generations for humanity's big
challenges, to humanity’s efficient and safe progression towards
that goal for which man was created, and all this for a
long-lasting period.
This is no Utopian fantasy. It is certainly feasible. This will
be presented and proved in the remainder of this chapter.
In the current situation, humanity has no choice - after all,
you will not choose a nuclear holocaust over a happy life with
all its implications.
A similar thing was said by Moses around 3200 years ago: “I have
set before thee this day life and good, and death and evil…
therefore choose life” (Deuteronomy 30:15-19). In other words,
God asks people to choose life, since according to Him, they
have something to live for.
To my pride and joy, the means for attaining of this exists in
the following unique, Divine declaration:
That man was created in
God's image.
This is the most dramatic means and perhaps the only one, which
truly raises man’s self-esteem. It is the acceptance of this
truth that will elevate it. So, this fabulous declaration opens
our spiritual gates to every natural development. Not only we
posses a high self-esteem; the other too was born in God’s image
so his self-esteem is high as well. Therefore, our approach
towards him will be accordingly , respectful and appreciative.
If we carefully examine the great power encapsulated in this
divine declaration, as expressed throughout the
book, we will realize that it achieves not only the
aforementioned goals, but far more. The declaration is indeed a
short one, but it has a content which is impressive and greater
than man has ever had in his fortune to receive.
|
